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About Lausanne

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

Gruppen & Treffen

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My job in the dating biz lets me peek at weird, yet sweet little quirks everywhere. I saw two lovebirds arguing over the best spot for a first date near Hohlstrasse – classic! That made me smile hard. Dirty little secrets? Yeah, there are plenty, but they’re addin’ flavor – spicing life up! “It’s like life’s cruel magic!” as Michael Haneke would mumble, deep in his film vibes.

Zurich Air Quality Index (AQI) and Switzerland Air Pollution